Top tips for new mums

Whether it’s your first, second, third, or fourth baby, there is always something to learn!  

 

Prep before baby arrives

Natalie (Basking Babies Colchester)

• Buy muslins, lots and lots of muslins!
• Towards the end of your pregnancy, meal prep all of your favourite dinners and freeze them. Thinking about having to cook or make food in those first few weeks is hard work.
• Have plenty of snacks and nibbles to hand.

 

•  I totally agree with the meal prep idea, or even just buy loads of nice ready meals from M&S or a local farm shop to stock up your freezer. You deserve it!
• My amazing mother-in-law made me batches of flapjacks and other treats that were easy to eat on the go when breastfeeding, so recruit your most talented baker friend for the task if you don’t fancy taking it on yourself.  
• This is a weird one, but it definitely worked for me! I prepped a whole load of enormous absorbent pads with lavender oil and aloe vera gel, then popped them in the freezer. They bring welcome relief for those first days following birth.  
• Set up changing stations upstairs and down – the last thing you want to be doing is getting half way through a nappy change and realising you have forgotten something. 

• Don’t forget you can always buy things after baby has arrived. There is no need to have ‘everything’ before baby is here. 

Jackie (Basking Babies Romford)

• Accept help – for house work, shopping, dog walks – you cannot do it all!  
• Meal prep your favourite meals as nothing tastes better than a home cooked meal when you are tired. I’ll never forget the first meal I had on our first night at home. My sister’s homemade beef stew and dumplings, eating it at midnight in my bed after feeding my daughter Izzy was the best feeling.  
• Stock up on muslins and baby grows with inbuilt scratch mittens. 

• I think we tend to get fixated on due dates but the average length of gestation is actually 38-42 weeks! If it’s your first, my advice would be to make a list of all the things you want to watch on Netflix. My little girl was 12 days late so I ended up binge watching Breaking Bad before she arrived! Friends reruns and podcasts also got me through a lot of night feeds.  
• In the time I spent waiting for my daughter to arrive I also did a lot of batch cooking and baking – a freezer full of flapjacks and chocolate brownies was a lifesaver when breastfeeding! 

Accept help and say ‘no’ when you need to 

Jess (Basking Babies Chelmsford)

• Accept help – don’t be afraid to say ‘yes’ to assistance (especially if people want to make or drop food round). 
• Equally, don’t be afraid to say ‘no’ to visitors or cancel visitors if you’re not up to it (unless you know they’re going to cook or do some washing for you rather than sit there holding your baby, expecting you to make tea!) 

Jackie (Basking Babies Romford)

• Definitely don’t be afraid to say ‘no’ to visitors in the first week. You have just become parents and it’s all new, you’re getting to know baby and baby is getting to know you.  

Natalie (Basking Babies Colchester)

• Tell your close friends and family that you want the first week home as just you and your new family with no visitors. Then if you feel well and up to it, you can invite people over. 

Time for yourself 

• Take time for you whenever you can (even if it means sneaking away when friends come to see the baby!) – my go to and something I still do now is spend half an hour in the bath every night with a book or magazine.  
• Ask for help – don’t think you have to do it all. 

• Postnatal minds and bodies need rest. I know you want to do it all and get out to the café to see friends and family but your body and your baby need to rest and time to adjust. I wish I had spent more time in bed with my first born with no other distractions rather than greeting visitors and being desperate to get out the house to show her off.

 

When it’s your second or third baby 

Vicky (Basking Babies Chafford Hundred & Upminster)

• A second child is a game changer and mum guilt is real but you can’t do it all so don’t try! 
• Try not to Google everything too much as it can worry you unnecessarily. Follow your instincts and if you’re worried about something, get in touch with your health visitor or GP. 
• Sleepless nights come and go even after the newborn stage but it’s all a phase and will pass. 
• I’d recommend not buying too many first size outfits, babies mainly live in grows or vests the first few weeks as they are comfortable and practical. 
• Try not to put too much pressure on yourself and make sure dad is doing his share too even if he is working. Being a mum is working too, except it’s not 9-5, it’s 24/7.  
• Slings are brilliant – I actually got to eat a warm dinner with two hands in a restaurant recently with my newborn son Ollie in the sling! 

Heather (Basking Babies Benfleet & Rayleigh)

• Something that has definitely helped me the second time round is knowing that each stage doesn’t last forever! The hard phases will end and they are tiny for such a short time so just enjoy those cuddles, those firsts and accept help for everything else. 
• Try not to plan too much in the first few months that doesn’t include your baby before they are here – it just puts pressure on you if you’re not ready to leave them so best to judge that once they arrive.  
• You will need ALL those bibs and muslins!

• Being organised & prepping as much as you can is my biggest piece of advice, especially if you have older siblings who have school or you have somewhere you need to be early. Try to make sure you have the changing bag stocked up ready to go, clothes out, shoes and bags by the door etc. The smallest things make life so much easier. 
• Keep nappies, wipes and a changing mat upstairs and downstairs so you’re ready to change baby whenever and wherever you need to. 
• If formula feeding, ready-made milks are very handy to have in the cupboard as back up. 

• Seek the ‘right’ people for the best advice (don’t Google everything or rely solely on grandparents as things change). Seek out a feeding expert for feeding advice, a tongue tie expert for tongue tie advice, postnatal physio or PT for body recovery advice and so on.  
• If you can’t sleep in the daytime, allow yourself to at least ‘rest’ during the day.  
• If your baby likes to be upright/carried/wakes every time you put them down/you have a dog to walk/it is your second or third baby/you want to feel close to baby, invest in a sling or visit a sling library for advice. You 100% won’t regret it! 

Most importantly…

• You can read every book under the sun, but your baby won’t have! Relax and do what feels right for you. 

• Go with your gut instincts. After all, you know your baby best. 

• Being a new mum is tough. It can test you to your limits even though it can also be the most wonderful, magical experience at the same time. It’s ok, and perfectly normal, to sometimes find things difficult or overwhelming. Know that. And know you’re not alone in those feelings. Adjust your expectations and your boundaries accordingly. Be kind to yourself. You are great…and that is just the way you are. In the eyes of your child, whatever you do and however you look, you are perfect.